80 fricken proof! And it's like candy!!!! simply like candy!
What could be better that Polish Wodka!??!?!
FLAVORED POLISH WODKA!!!!!
Hehe!!!! made from grain...woo this stuff is getting me going!
If you have ever had Southern Comfort this would be the Polish equivalent...except this is better having a flavor of orange and clove - yum.
ah....
Anyway...I think I may have a mean streak of some sorts. Right now I am totally holding back...I have things that I would say normally if I wasn't so lately concerned with what I say...
What should I do? Should I offend? Do I offend? I think I do...But the problem is that being offensive is getting increasingly easier to do these days because...of what? You know! "delicate sensibilites" and why are such things that way? I mean in the 50's people wouldn't talk about the same things we do now as freely as we do now and if they did then...well "it was yo ass!" But I'm trying Ringo...I'm trying real hard to be the shepard....
(lets go off on a tangent shall we? yes we shall...)
Ezekiel 25:17
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyrany of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and good will shepards the weak through the valley of darkness for he is truly his brothers keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengence and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengence upon you."
Ah yeah...that's some cold blooded shit you could say to a muthafucka before you pop a cap in his ass...
But is it really!?!?!? l)runken l2icksor! here shall do some investigative reporting!!!!
First off a little history...I was baptised Catholic...and more than likely it was against my will although I must admit that I had difficulty forming complete thoughts at such a young age...I think I was just a few months old...
Anyway - things are different now and I only have trouble forming complete thoughts after I have drank and inordinately large amount of alcohol and/or recreational/prescription drugs...
So what the fuck! (Whoa profanity!)
Ok maybe I should take a minute to explain why I profane...It simply gets the point across with more effect than without and it's somewhat ridiculous. And you should know that when I say things such as, "You stupid fucks" or "You fucking idiots" or "You fucking blah blah blah whatever the fuck..." that you shouldn't take it personally because it's not meant to be that way! Take it personally if I use your name! I'm just being colorful you "stupid muthafucker!" See how that works? It's actually quite affectionate "you god damn asswipe!" It's all about affection see? God damnit I don't know why the fuck I even need to explain this shit to you all oh wait! it's because you are all a bunch of stupid motherfuckers!!!! hehehe! See!! Fun!!!! I know you all aren't a bunch of stupid motherbleepers and you know that! (Well actually there might be some lurkers that don't have a high enough level of self esteem to know otherwise but who the fuck cares! I sure as hell don't so FUCK them...) Hehe! Fun!!!!! Using profanity is fun! It aids in creating provacary!!!
Ok so where was I....oh yeah l)runken l2icks0r! the investigative reporter!!!
Let's just see what the hell is up with Ezekiel 25:17 according to my Good News Bible I stole from some shit hole fucking motel...
Why the hell would I steal a bible? OH yeah cuz I was probably drunk and don't actually remember stealing it...
So yeah...According to my Good News Bible Ezekiel 25:17 reads:
"I will punish them severely and take full revenge on them. They will feel my anger. Then they will know that I am the Lord."
Hmm...that doesn't really read the same as what Jules Winfield said....I guess I need a different bible. What the hell is up with that anyway? They didn't already know that he was the Lord? He should know if they knew already anyway - he could make them know if he REALLY is the fricken son of God! Crap...am I making fun of Jesus now? Is this blasphemy? I shouldn't poke fun at the Lord now should I! But I am not a God-fearning man! I know that Jesus got down with the ladies from time to time and liked sinning and he knows that I know so *censored* Jesus!!!! hehe!!!! See! Fun!!!!!
Whoa would you look at that! Check this passage out that must have been somewhat related to the naming of Morpheus's ship in the Matrix:
Ezekiel 26:7
The Sovereign Lord says, "I am going to bring the greatest king of all - King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylonia - to attack Tyre. He will come from the north with a huge army, with horses and chariots and with cavalry."
Nebuchadnezzar...interesting...spelling...
Hmm...what the hell else is in this stupid book...God damnit! Yes God, please damn this book!!! yes seriously God would you please damn this book? I fear that there are many other discrepencies here...How can you allow this!
Come on! You can do it! You are so divine! You've done far worse! Such as Kings 7:8
"Now Elisha had told the woman who lived in Shunem, whose son he had brought back to life, that the Lord was sending a famine on the land, which would last for seven years, and that she should leave with her family and go live somewhere else."
What's up with this, oh Lord, you bring some kid back to life and then make the rest of the land suffer with famine? How is that cool? So damn this damnable Good News bible while you are feeling oh so divine will you?
Let's see what else there is in this somewhat interesting book:
Whoa there is some fucked up shit regarding Jews in Esther 8 where this guy Haman ordered the destruction of all Jews! but it didn't happen because of Esther throwing herself at the feet of this King, Xerxes, and she is a Queen no less...
Anyway here is some likely non-original text regarding his response:
"Look, I have hanged Haman for his plot against the Jews, and I have given Esther his property. But a proclamation issued in the king's name and stamped with the royal seal connot be revoked. You may, however write to the Jews whatever you like and you may write it in my name and stamp it with the royal seal." blah blah blah...eventually the Jews destroy their enemy and then have a festival...and probably do some sinning...
Jesus Christ this shit is depressing....fuck...ok admitedly I am drunk and have read ahead a bit here but damn this guy Job sounds a little depressed...check dis shizzza out yo where Job is complaining like the fucking little whiny wuss that he is:
Job 3
Finally Job broke the silence and cursed the day on which he had been born... (how many times have you cursed your own birthday? this is some fucked up depressing shite)
O God, put a curse on the day I was born;
put a curse on the night when I was conceived!
Turn that day into darkness, God.
Never again remember that day;
never again let light shine on it.
Make it a day of gloom and thick darkness;
cover it with clouds, and blot out the sun.
Blot that night out of the year,
and never let it be counted again;
make it a barrent joyless night.
Tell the sorcerers to curse that day,
those who know how to control Leviathan.
Keep the morning star from shining;
give that night no hope of dawn.
Curse that night for letting me be born,
for exposing me to trouble and grief.
I wish I had died in my mother's womb
or died the moment I was born.
Why did my mother hold me on her knees?
Why did she feed me at her breast?
If I had died then, I would be at rest now,
sleeping like the kings and rulers
who rebuilt ancient palaces.
Then I would be sleeping like princes who
filled their houses with gold and silver, or sleeping
like a stillborn child.
In the grave wicked men stop their evil,
and tired workment find rest at last.
Even prisoners enjoy peace, free from shouts
and harsh commands.
Everyone is there, the famous and the
unknown and slaves at last are free.
Why let men go on living in misery?
Why give light to men in grief?
They wait for death, but it never comes;
they prefer a grave to any treasure.
They are not happy till they are dead and buried;
God keeps their future hidden and hems them in on
every side.
Instead of eating, I mourn, and I can never stop groaning.
Everything I fear and dread comes true.
I have no peace, no rest, and my troubles never end....
WOW! This guy Job is pretty depressed...you see earlier Satan and the Lord got to talking...The Lord asked Satan, "So like what's up yo? where you been Satan?"
and Satan answered: (this is real bible text now)
"I have been walking here and there, roaming around the earth."
then the Lord says:
"Did you notice my servant Job?"
Anyway it's kind of boring...actually I just don't feel like typing it but after the Lord bragged about how his servant Job was so faithful to him Satan thought that he would test Job by covering his body with sores! And prior to that Job lost all his weath and children! And that is why he was so depressed and probably now somewhat explains the aforementioned text eh?
Whatever this is just ridiculous....Actually I find this shit offensive...I'm surprised there aren't people in this world that protest the bible and say it's totally offensive etc...because in some ways it kind of is...but who the fuck cares!?!??! people with delicate sensiblities that's who...ok so I'm pretty drunk now...I hear a burrito calling my name...I shall ask the Lord to bless it with abundant nutrition and anti-hangover qualities...hehe!
