Late Night IDE install madness - with your host l2eckluse!

[N3ur0n0saurusl2exs0r!!!]

Probably just wasting my time here since I doubt anyone is interested in this kind of thing but this was more than the necessary staple pain in the ass standard for getting and IDE up and running.

l2eckluse!: Ok...so tonight's guest is Mr. Eclipse Helios

[audience cheers]

Helios: Thank you...thank you...

l2eckluse!: Thanks for coming on my show Helios!

Helios: No problem! I love doing appearances like this.

l2eckluse!: Wow, that's just great...great...so how you been?

Helios: Oh you know things have been pretty good...Been enjoying existing across multiple platforms...Especially with the powerful rising of my little brother in code Android with the help of Mother Google of course.

l2eckluse!: Really? I didn't know that Android was Java based - well how about that...

Helios: Android = Java;

l2eckluse!: You just couldn't resist talking in code could you!

[audience laughs]

l2eckluse!: So how do you think Android is doing against iPhone?

Helios: Well, I've always regarded Apple as more of luxury computing equipment while Android is for the people. I have a lot of faith in my little bro to overpower iPhone in terms of market share because of functionality and sheer brute force. iOS really doesn't offer enough to be better than my little sibling. He is simply going to overrun the world...he scares me a little bit sometimes...

l2eckluse!: If I am not mistaken I believe Android may actually have a larger market share than iOS.

Helios: doesn't surprise me

[l2eckluse! nods head]

Helios: I think one of the greatest innovations doesn't come from Android but from a Seattle based company called Swype which currently runs primarily on Android. With the typical Apple arrogance I doubt they will adopt the technology and that is going to seriously affect the iOS. Swype are going to change the world when it comes to touchscreen text input.

l2eckluse!: oh yeah I totally agree. It is ultimately an inevitability.

[Helios nods head]

* COMMERICAL BREAK *

l2eckluse!: Welcome back everyone! I've been kickin it moon style with Helios tonight!

Helios: I can't believe you just said "kickin it."

[l2eckluse!'s facial color value increases by #050000]

l2eckluse: Ahh...hahaha...well! How about we go through a nice install of you for our audience?

Helios: Haha! I can't believe you are putting me on the spot like this!

l2eckluse!: Oh yeah, and on Windows 7 with the 64-bit version of you!

Helios: OH GOD NO!!!

l2eckluse!: What do you think people??? You wanna see how Helios dances the install mambo???

[audience cheers loudly]

Helios: Seriously ever since Oracle started running things there have been a few issues...of course Sun didn't do much better but I can't believe you are putting me on the spot like this!

l2eckluse!: hehe, well here tonight we have yet another special guest appearance people! We originally called on Triumph the insult comic dog but he is unfortunately in the process of undergoing fecal bacteriotherapy for the treatment of a recurrent clostridium difficile infection.

Helios: What??? what the hell is that?

l2eckluse!: I have no idea but here to take his place is NONE OTHER THAN THE UNCANNY, UNORTHODOX, UNBELIEVABLE, UNSANE, l2icks0r!!!!

[l2eckluse! goes off stage]

[A huge keyboard and display are lowered from the ceiling as teh l2icks0r! dances onto the stage while a curtain drops revealing the Crystal Method playing something not ever heard before]

[crowd cheers extremely loudly]

[l2icks0r! starts typing on the huge keys with his fists madly commentating as he goes in a very animated fashion]


Step 1: (Install a JVM)

went to java.com and installed from downloads section

Installed Java Version 6 update 26 to Program Files (x86)
jre6

This allows Java Programs to run...too bad it was 32-bit - how to install 64-bit????


Step 2: (Install a JDK or a JRE)
I chose to install jdk-6u26-windows-i586.exe (I think 64 bit is for AMD CPUs)
went to www.oracle.com to get this file.

installed to c:\program files (x86)


Step 3: (install Eclipse)
I went to www.eclipse.org and insalled Eclipse IDE for Java Developers (64-bit version)
eclipse-jee-helios-SR2-win32-x86_64.zip

Installing for Eclipse just means unzipping to a directory


(set the path for the JRE for system variables in environment variables)
c:\program files (x86)\Java\jre6\bin


At this point I get an error from Eclipse when I tried to run eclipse.exe

"Failed to load the JNI shared library "c:\program files (x86)\Java\jre6\bin\client\jvm.dll"


* I am stuck here because the jvm.dll exists in the above directory *

The next step I did was to install the JDK for I don't know what reason....

I installed jdk-6-windows-i586.zip to the default directory the installer used

** Stuck again for the same reason as above - again the file exists in the path specified by the error dialog so WTF!??!?! **

"Failed to load the JNI shared library "c:\program files (x86)\Java\jre6\bin\client\jvm.dll"

Eclipse fails to run

In the "c:\Program Files (x86)\Java" directory I have:
jdk1.6.0
jdk1.6.0_26
jre1.6.0
jre6

I have no idea what to do now to get Eclipse to run...I didn't have this problem last time... I don't know what the fuck I can do at this point other than install more crap in the hope that there will just be nothing else to do...Basically I am totally stuck again.

javaw.exe does execute from the cmd.exe at this point though which was a problem from previous attempts

I uninstalled Java(TM) SE Development Kit 6 Update 26 using Programs and Features from the control panel
I uninstalled Java(TM) SE Development Kit 6 using Programs and Features from the control panel

I reinstalled Java Platform JDK from www.oracle.com "jdk-6u25-windows-i586.exe"
(This is Java(TM) SE Development Kit 6 Update 25)

* I get the error that a newer version of Java is already installed * (((( FUCKING GREAT )))


Back to the fucking JNI shared library error...

NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT THE FUCK TO DO!!!!! It was not this hard last time I installed Eclipse...WTF....


Investigating how to install Eclipse by asking mother Google


Saying fuck you to 64-bit version of Eclipse and submitting to 32-bit version because what the fuck...what the fuck else to fucking do?


downloading eclipse-jee-helios-SR2-win32.zip

Again "installing" Eclipse simply means unzipping the file and running the eclipse.exe from within the unzipped directory

***** WAAAAAA-MUTHAAA-FUCKIN-LAAAAA BEEEEOTCH!!!! *****

Shit fucking works now B...what the fuck...fucking 64-bit nonsensical install bullshite!!!! FUCKETH YOU!!!!! You 64-bit FAG you!!!!


When I run Helios it asks me through the Workspace Launcher where I want to store my workspace so I put it in my programming/java directory instead of the user directory that it defaults to on C: My programming directory is on my D: drive

Check the box that sets that as the default location instead of asking upon every load.


What a fuckin little bitch...anyways... at the fucking Eclipse Welcome thing now...


I say...close that shit...get rid of the mutha fucking faggy welcome tab so we can do what the fuck I was first inclined to install this quality application despite the install pain in the arse...seriously this is a quality piece of pro level development software...

* I take that back....who can resist but to go through ye olde standard "Hello world" tutorial??? I almost did but too easy to just click upon the tutorial... *

Interestingly enough when I bring up the About Eclipse dialog it says that it is "Eclipse Java EE IDE for Web Developers." I say what the fuck ever to that...

Ok...so that was interesting...basically holds your hand through the creation of a Java Application....so yeah...bouts to get my original purpose for installing all this shit on now...

* The l2icks0r! software engineering saga continues *


END OF LINE

[R3C]

Just before the credits start to roll, 3l R3cogniz3r0 hops onto the stage!!!!

***Crowd goes crazy [like a MULE]***

3l R3cogniz3r0 pats his hands in the air to motion the crowd to an eventual silence, and pauses for dramatic effect.

***Crowd shushes to a dull murmur, still surprised at such an appearance***

3l R3cogniz3r0 strolls over to l2icksor, and says:

"Silly l2icksor, everyone knows that i586 does not mean 64 bit/X64!"
"It just means Pentium instruction compatible, and is in fact 32 bit."

***Grins, and teeth sparkle with little sparkly stars***

"Daaaaammmnnnn riiiiigggghhhhtttt"

"If it don't say X64, it ain't X64! Word!"

***3l R3cogniz3r0 slinks off stage right***

***Crowd elevates back to the status of Multiple Use Labor Element with a bad motivator***

Credits roll.

[N3ur0n0saurusl2exs0r!!!]

l2icks0r!: damnit!!! Damnit to hell!!!! AND BACK!!!!!!!!

[l2icks0r! asks Mother Google for Win 32 64-bit x86 link ]

Mother Google: replies with a huge link with the file on the end which is eclipse-SDK-3.6.2-win32-x86_64.zip

[l2icks0r! installs and gets the same damn error as before...and just walks off stage]

[R3C]

***Producer of the show walks onto the stage.***

***Producer looks into the camera, and says...***

That's really odd actually. Because, Win32 implies X86 32 bit. To just tack 64 onto the end would be a very odd naming convention.

***Audience member #358 asks:***

"Is there an: Eclipse-SDK-3.6.2-X64?"

***Some random guy standing by the door says:***

"I would think any of the ones here: http://www.eclipse.org/downloads/ with 64 bit link, would do. Unless I'm missing something. ???"

[N3ur0n0saurusl2exs0r!!!]

Yeah, those are the links that I used. I got the 32-bit versions of the top two running but not the 64-bit versions...Is good enough for now - everything works so is fine.

[N3ur0n0saurusl2exs0r!!!]

Finally got it working...there was another downloads page with more files...so yeah...it is as simple as it should be you just have to know which 64 bit versions to get - which didn't exist on the page I went to for some reason. I didn't even have to set the path in the environment variables.

Not that anyone even cares about how to do this but all I did was uninstall all previous versions of Java

Then for my Q9450 on 64-bit Windows 7 I installed:

jdk-6u26-windows-x64.exe

from:

http://www.oracle.com/technetwork/java/ ... 00750.html

and then just went to eclipse.org and just downloaded the 64-bit version of Eclipse for Java developers here:

http://www.eclipse.org/downloads/


All that you have to do to run is just unzip the folder and run the eclipse.exe - there is no install

done.

[N3ur0n0saurusl2exs0r!!!]

Tomorrow is a special day!

(again not that anyone cares...)

But Indigo is being released!!!! w00t!

Every year in June Eclipse releases a new version - they are always on time.

Juno is already scheduled for 2012

Right now I use Helios - they have this thing with naming all versions off of moons

The cool thing is you just download a folder and run eclipse.exe and you are done...love those kinds of programs that just work like that!


So...hopefully I can figure out how to setup some kind of fast Java->OpenGL->Shader pipeline so there can be very fast and very cool graphics in a low overhead system programming environment to do full screen graphics...even windowed would be fine too though...

Just to give you an idea though to setup a fullscreen Direct3D context it takes a few thousand lines of code...

The last time I did it in C++ using OpenGL it was about 600 lines of code - which is pretty damn small actually.

For what I have seen in Java you can setup an OpenGL display in about 20 lines of code...to which I say FRICKEN w00t!

[R3C]

A day before your birthday too. Nice!