Teh night of teh l)runken l)ead!!!
Posted: Wed Mar 23, 2005 12:14 am
Ah yeah...La Fin Du Monde is spinning in my head and so it is therefore teh night of teh l)runken l)ead!!!! or sooon to be? I dunno...inebriation is interesting sometimes...other times not so just stupid.
So what the hell has happened in teh life of teh l)runken lately...not much...getting less l)runken less and less as time passes...Interest has lied more and more in finding such by other means through moderation if you can beleive such things...I barely do....but it is true....
I love me some La Fin though...so yummy...I had some weird ass Athena ESB earlier this loveless evening but it sucked because it was too bittar...I say loveless because there is no love for teh l2icks0r! it was an incredbly uneventful day. I received no email...I usually always get email...sometimes even from a female - but not today...and what ring tones on yon cell phone chime? not a one...no calls for the loveless and poor l2icks0r!...
The high of the record setting day is all over with - it has completely diminished and turned itself into a little known form of depression I have low amounts of experience with. It is easy to understand though - all the weeks and weeks of training and preparation for that one moment...and then after the moment is realized the high begins and lasts for a few days but then the come down has to occur and just like all come downs it is unwanted...and it sucks...and the question "Now what?" enters into yon mind...Simple answers come...but seem less appealing...set another record...move up a weight class...the next one is only 21lbs more than you have done...but then realization hits that the high from that will be less than the previous...just like anything though - the first time is the best. I must say I do enjoy being drunk though...especially with some nice loud ass house accompanying the la fin...ah yeah...
Is it kind of weird though?…I mean you would think that achievement would be a totally welcome thing – and it was for a while but then it just turned into depression…So strange when I think about it you know? Why would doing something so good depress you? I think it actually makes sense though because that was the culmination of so much work and then you peak and then it’s all over – now what? You know? It’s like coming down from a high…who likes to not be high anymore – especially if the high is even remotely substantial…and then it is back to boring old lame life…
What was interesting is the lack of interest in getting out of control through the use of drugs/alcohol. I think the reason why was because of the night of the meet I got ridiculously out of control so I got it out of my system – heh now what!? You know? Work! Yeah woohoo! Just what the fuck I wanted to do is go do some fucking work. I had already exhausted my usual comfort activities so there was literally nothing left for me to do – so I did nothing.
I’m still trying to figure things out about myself further – I’m too volatile sometimes I think. I wish I could be more consistent and more predictable? I don’t know maybe that isn’t that good of a word to choose because I think I am probably pretty predictable. What do I want anymore? That kind of freaks me out a little bit – makes me feel uncomfortable. Hmm...I am a slight bit inebriated tonight. I almost didn’t want to but I thought what the hell there are still some crappy food items left in the house so I might as well make a party of it and all and drink some beer and eat all the crappy repugnant shit that is still left over before the crazy journey begins of ultra healthy athleticismic fitnessality. Heh, there I go again making up words… Basically I think it all comes down to when I decide to do something – I do it to the hyper extremes. Like when I wanted to beef my car up? I take it as far as it can go and race the thing kick ass and win money. When I wanted to learn to shoot a gun? I fucking learned to shoot the fucking gun. When I want to fucking eat – I fucking EAT! When I sleep? I FUCKING SLEEEP!!!!! Same thing goes for drinking. It’s just the way I am. My powerlifting friends think I am an alcoholic after having witnessed a ridiculous post record setting drinking binge episode which involved giving my friend a bloody lip - (I of course have no recollection)…but it’s just like I said – when I feel like drinking I fucking drink. Weight lifting was no different. When I decided to get into weight lifting I fucking got into weight lifting and the next thing you know – well you know what has happened lately. It really shouldn’t be any surprise for those who know me. I like taking things to hyper extremes…I believe I realized this long ago when I outlined it in my Fast Cupid profile…Yeah yeah yeah...I have used an online dating service...I have quite the profile...fuck - take a look if you wish:
http://www.fastcupid.com/profile.aspx?r ... 9510&pos=0
So where the hell was I? oh yeah...following through to the absolute hyper extremes…is so appealing. Taking something as far as you can go is what makes it worth doing. Fuck…I know I said I HATE challenges and that I hate goals and that I am not a competitive person but sometimes I think I may get caught up in the byproducts produced by absolute hyper extremes – lets just call this abhyex…what a strange word…good enough though. So yeah the byproduct of abhyex can be indicative of the presence of either non-abhorrence of challenges or competitive indulgence thus the ignis fatuus if you will…I get mislead by this all the time and think that I am actually a competitive person who loves challenges…far from it…I hate them! challenges suck. I think it may be simply passion that carries me through such tribulations…whatever I shall continue to confuse thyself…
Ah crap...out of la fin...now what? heh...that is SO the question...Now what?!
Should I continue to ramble? Could I continue to ramble? Hehe - of course I could...the question is really if I should...hmm...I wish I had some wine...monkey wine would be damn fine...but of course I have achieved quite the remarkable buzz...I am extremely buzzed but I am so capable of functioning in this state that is really not that big of a deal. I suppose it should be a big fricken deal because I am so friggin ripped...
heh...speaking of ripped...that is something of the final frontier for me I have so deemed...It is something of a grantable meaning in the quest for what meaning there is in my current life...after undergoing somewhat of an achievement based depression... yeah... that will be the next big thing for me...to get ripped off my friggen monkey assed ass...ripped to teh bone if you will...something I am entirely capable of but have not really followed through with beyond the 11.5% mark...I estimate the current state of l2icks0r being to be within 12-13%...at 187lbs... Heh...yeah...I've gained 7lbs in three days...Body weight is so easy to manipulate...if you are teh l2icks0r! hehe....
Supposedly, from what I have read, abs are most visible starting at around 8% body fat...That is quite low...but most of teh ladies are supposed to like teh abs...but - at that low of body fat you would have quite the visible vascularity...lots of veiny veins...which can kind of start to get a bit borderline on the disgusting scale...hmm...I am highly prone to vein visibility too...but maybe I can offset that by keeping my neck visible? yayaya...whatever...ripped to the bone it is...I'll try this for the next 12 weeks and see what happens...I should be able to get to 0% body fat by then! hehe...no seriously I should be at 12-13% right now and it was pretty easy to lose about 1% per week but there has to be a point where it slows down substantially...Ok so 12 weeks to drop 4% body fat...yeah...well...lets see what happens...see you all in 12 weeks!
So what the hell has happened in teh life of teh l)runken lately...not much...getting less l)runken less and less as time passes...Interest has lied more and more in finding such by other means through moderation if you can beleive such things...I barely do....but it is true....
I love me some La Fin though...so yummy...I had some weird ass Athena ESB earlier this loveless evening but it sucked because it was too bittar...I say loveless because there is no love for teh l2icks0r! it was an incredbly uneventful day. I received no email...I usually always get email...sometimes even from a female - but not today...and what ring tones on yon cell phone chime? not a one...no calls for the loveless and poor l2icks0r!...
The high of the record setting day is all over with - it has completely diminished and turned itself into a little known form of depression I have low amounts of experience with. It is easy to understand though - all the weeks and weeks of training and preparation for that one moment...and then after the moment is realized the high begins and lasts for a few days but then the come down has to occur and just like all come downs it is unwanted...and it sucks...and the question "Now what?" enters into yon mind...Simple answers come...but seem less appealing...set another record...move up a weight class...the next one is only 21lbs more than you have done...but then realization hits that the high from that will be less than the previous...just like anything though - the first time is the best. I must say I do enjoy being drunk though...especially with some nice loud ass house accompanying the la fin...ah yeah...
Is it kind of weird though?…I mean you would think that achievement would be a totally welcome thing – and it was for a while but then it just turned into depression…So strange when I think about it you know? Why would doing something so good depress you? I think it actually makes sense though because that was the culmination of so much work and then you peak and then it’s all over – now what? You know? It’s like coming down from a high…who likes to not be high anymore – especially if the high is even remotely substantial…and then it is back to boring old lame life…
What was interesting is the lack of interest in getting out of control through the use of drugs/alcohol. I think the reason why was because of the night of the meet I got ridiculously out of control so I got it out of my system – heh now what!? You know? Work! Yeah woohoo! Just what the fuck I wanted to do is go do some fucking work. I had already exhausted my usual comfort activities so there was literally nothing left for me to do – so I did nothing.
I’m still trying to figure things out about myself further – I’m too volatile sometimes I think. I wish I could be more consistent and more predictable? I don’t know maybe that isn’t that good of a word to choose because I think I am probably pretty predictable. What do I want anymore? That kind of freaks me out a little bit – makes me feel uncomfortable. Hmm...I am a slight bit inebriated tonight. I almost didn’t want to but I thought what the hell there are still some crappy food items left in the house so I might as well make a party of it and all and drink some beer and eat all the crappy repugnant shit that is still left over before the crazy journey begins of ultra healthy athleticismic fitnessality. Heh, there I go again making up words… Basically I think it all comes down to when I decide to do something – I do it to the hyper extremes. Like when I wanted to beef my car up? I take it as far as it can go and race the thing kick ass and win money. When I wanted to learn to shoot a gun? I fucking learned to shoot the fucking gun. When I want to fucking eat – I fucking EAT! When I sleep? I FUCKING SLEEEP!!!!! Same thing goes for drinking. It’s just the way I am. My powerlifting friends think I am an alcoholic after having witnessed a ridiculous post record setting drinking binge episode which involved giving my friend a bloody lip - (I of course have no recollection)…but it’s just like I said – when I feel like drinking I fucking drink. Weight lifting was no different. When I decided to get into weight lifting I fucking got into weight lifting and the next thing you know – well you know what has happened lately. It really shouldn’t be any surprise for those who know me. I like taking things to hyper extremes…I believe I realized this long ago when I outlined it in my Fast Cupid profile…Yeah yeah yeah...I have used an online dating service...I have quite the profile...fuck - take a look if you wish:
http://www.fastcupid.com/profile.aspx?r ... 9510&pos=0
So where the hell was I? oh yeah...following through to the absolute hyper extremes…is so appealing. Taking something as far as you can go is what makes it worth doing. Fuck…I know I said I HATE challenges and that I hate goals and that I am not a competitive person but sometimes I think I may get caught up in the byproducts produced by absolute hyper extremes – lets just call this abhyex…what a strange word…good enough though. So yeah the byproduct of abhyex can be indicative of the presence of either non-abhorrence of challenges or competitive indulgence thus the ignis fatuus if you will…I get mislead by this all the time and think that I am actually a competitive person who loves challenges…far from it…I hate them! challenges suck. I think it may be simply passion that carries me through such tribulations…whatever I shall continue to confuse thyself…
Ah crap...out of la fin...now what? heh...that is SO the question...Now what?!
Should I continue to ramble? Could I continue to ramble? Hehe - of course I could...the question is really if I should...hmm...I wish I had some wine...monkey wine would be damn fine...but of course I have achieved quite the remarkable buzz...I am extremely buzzed but I am so capable of functioning in this state that is really not that big of a deal. I suppose it should be a big fricken deal because I am so friggin ripped...
heh...speaking of ripped...that is something of the final frontier for me I have so deemed...It is something of a grantable meaning in the quest for what meaning there is in my current life...after undergoing somewhat of an achievement based depression... yeah... that will be the next big thing for me...to get ripped off my friggen monkey assed ass...ripped to teh bone if you will...something I am entirely capable of but have not really followed through with beyond the 11.5% mark...I estimate the current state of l2icks0r being to be within 12-13%...at 187lbs... Heh...yeah...I've gained 7lbs in three days...Body weight is so easy to manipulate...if you are teh l2icks0r! hehe....
Supposedly, from what I have read, abs are most visible starting at around 8% body fat...That is quite low...but most of teh ladies are supposed to like teh abs...but - at that low of body fat you would have quite the visible vascularity...lots of veiny veins...which can kind of start to get a bit borderline on the disgusting scale...hmm...I am highly prone to vein visibility too...but maybe I can offset that by keeping my neck visible? yayaya...whatever...ripped to the bone it is...I'll try this for the next 12 weeks and see what happens...I should be able to get to 0% body fat by then! hehe...no seriously I should be at 12-13% right now and it was pretty easy to lose about 1% per week but there has to be a point where it slows down substantially...Ok so 12 weeks to drop 4% body fat...yeah...well...lets see what happens...see you all in 12 weeks!