THE ONE GALLON CHALLANGE

[Beeeph]

Alright people, this battle is long overdue! We've been discussing, laughing, and frolicing over the ONE GALLON CHALLANGE for far too long now, and I'm willing to bet my $20 that I can drink a single gallon of milk faster than you can!

OK, here are the official OGCA rules, NOT open for revising or amending of any kind:

Rule #1: The first contestant to drink a gallon of milk wins 75% of the pot and an !!!XSHOK!!! xbox gamepad ($100 value), 2nd place recieves the remaining 25%, and 3rd place gets $10 back which is to be split between 1st and 2nd place winners.

Rule #2: There is NO prize for finishing your gallon of milk. This is a contest of who can finish the FASTEST! If you dont think you can finish a gallon of milk, then dont sign up. If three people finish drinking their gallon of milk before you, then you can stop drinking, the contest is over.

Rule #3: Puking is encouraged. There is no possible way your stomach can hold even a half gallon of milk at any given time. Puking is to be expected. Puking on other contestants is not permitted...but shit happens.

Rule #4: A minimum of four contestants is required for the challange to take place. This is to guarantee the 3rd place winner doesn't walk away with more money than the 2nd place winner. The more contestants the better.

Rule #5: Anyone interested in competing must provide their own gallon of milk, of any flavor. A $20 entrance fee is also required.

Rule #6: You must be at least 4 feet tall with at least three working limbs. Pregnant people and sigma team members are not permitted to compete.

Those are the rules, take em or leave em.

The ideal environment for this contest would be outdoors, surrounded by many drunk spectators. It must be scheduled before the weddings and while Kevin and I are in town. So thats anytime in between the 19th and the 22nd of August. Spread the word people, the more contestants, the more cash you compete for. SO WHO'S IN?

[Beeeph]

Count me in! You're all goin down! No way am I giving up one of my XSHOK controllers without a fight.

[R3C]

... I'd like to be advised of the results, though I don't want to be present for the actual contest. When I see people puking, it tends to make me want to puke, and that just won't do.

[spidermonkey]

Good thing you put that sigma team clause in there.

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[enderzero]

You know I am in!!

We have been talking about this damn thing for far too long and is mutha fawking time we got down to business.

BRING IT ON BEEEPHY!!

[R3C]

... nice ASCII Sigma Team Bastard.

An' tha Sigma go wooo woooooooo!!!!

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O< wooo woooooooooo!!!!!!
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S I G M A - B A S T A R D

[Goemon]

Why don't you guys do "Edward 40hands" instead? At least then the guaranteed vomit is mitigated by the fact that you're getting fucked up.

[Beeeph]

I plan to be slightly smashed going into this contest. I'm gonna have to be to stand a chance against Agent Sauce and Endervomit. McNevlar poses a bit of a challange as well. But the rest of you suckers DONT HAVE A SNOWFLAKE'S CHANCE IN HELL OF DEFEATING ME! NOW WHO'S GONNA PROVE ME WRONG?

[enderzero]

I'm in training right now. I am starting at 1 cup a day, and working my way up to 2 cups a day by the time the big day comes.

BTW....You're a gonner boy!

[enderzero]

FAILURE!! Complete and udder ( ) failure!

I want to go on the record by saying that I was gung ho...but the other main two contestants couldn't get their acts together.

Some day the One Gallon Milk Challenge will be attempted...

[spidermonkey]

Probably due to Sigma Team sabotage.

[SpeedCricket]

Udder failure indeed! However, I can personally attest that much cow flesh was consumed...

[Bill Drayton Jr.]

Fuck milk!

See who can drink 750ml of 101 proof Wild Turkey the fastest!


Milk....jeeeezus fucking christ....be a fucking man....or at least some semblance of a monkey...